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My Judgment Is My Teacher

December 29, 2014 by Jordan Gray

Fotolia_52686024_Subscription_Monthly_MThere are moments when we judge ourselves. There is no right or wrong, good or bad in this experience unless we judge judgment to be bad and wrong. Making peace with our judgment moves us closer to living our oneness. Our judgment defines who we are, and it shapes the beliefs and values we represent in this lifetime – it is an inseparable part of our journey. As we grow to understand the natural function of judgment, we may release our guilt about it.

Some teachers disguise judgment as discernment; they teach us that it is wrong to judge but wise to use discernment. Discernment is simply a synonym for judgment, nothing more. In my judgment, teaching us to frown upon judgment is a religious tenet that promotes our habits of separation and internal conflict. Disguising judgment in the cloak of the gentler, more “spiritually” correct words such as discernment is manipulative. It does not support our growth, our awareness, and our awakening.

Using another word for judgment allows us to continue believing that judgment is bad while discernment has good intentions. What if we allow the word judgment to have equally good intentions? By treating our natural inclination to judge as a bad thing, we continue to promote the idea that there’s something wrong with human nature. Shameful judgment about judgment has been handed to us, without question, through religion and spirituality.

As an example, in the Christian community, issuing a judgment is considered wrong. Certain scriptures admonish Christians not to judge. There is wisdom in this teaching when the aim of the followers is to love one another unconditionally. Yet, included in the Christian faith there are many rules by which devotees judge each other as well as non-believers. Christians say that it is wrong to judge, while they engage in judgment. Teaching people that it is bad to judge is confusing. This is the moment, right now, for us to grow beyond the guilt and shame of our nature to judge and cultivate our awareness of oneness.

Yet judgment can become an obstacle on our path. When I forget that ALL of my judgment is an expression of who I am, I have fallen asleep and imagine that we are separate. Living our oneness, I remember that I cannot judge you, nor can you judge me. Every judgment made reveals only who I am; it’s not about you. My judgment tells me what is right or wrong for me – not for you. Your judgment is not about me, either.

Moreover, falling into a habit of pretending that I am judging you creates energy blockages in my expression of life energy. Pretending that I’m judging others blinds me to my whole self. Do I judge myself to be better than or lesser than another? Do my judgments block my compassion and empathy for myself and others? Do I permit my judgment to create “us versus them” energy in our society? Is my attention present or have I fallen asleep? When I am awake, my judgment is a teacher that I heed. I am grateful to my judgment for revealing my core beliefs.

Further, if I judge myself harshly, I invite feelings of guilt and shame into my expression of life energy. Feelings of shame and guilt are not good or bad either, yet if they become stuck in the energy body, these feelings begin to manifest as ailments in the physical body. All feeling energy is meant to be felt in the moment and released. Upon judging ourselves as guilty, we feel ashamed and tend to punish ourselves repeatedly. We attach to our judgment of guilt rather than accept the message within it and let it go. The path to letting go of my guilt is to forgive myself completely. Forgiveness is not about forgetting the lesson; forgiveness is about love.

There is value in remembering that just as I cannot actually judge another, I cannot be judged by another. Outwardly directed judgment is an illusion. I have discovered the humor in observing the judgment issued regarding the judgment of others. If someone points out that I am judging them, I own it. Also, if they are a student of oneness, I ask, who is judging you? I cannot feel judged by another unless I allow myself to adopt a feeling of guilt. I cannot judge another, and no one judges me but me. If I have forgotten this, I am grateful to be reminded. I understand that ALL judgment is self-judgment. Embracing our nature to judge frees us from imagined separation. All judgment is spoken into the mirror of reality. Do I listen to the voice of my judgment? What am I learning about who I am? How do my beliefs serve me?

I set the intention to let my judgment be my teacher. Judgment is a natural part of life, and I embrace the function of judgment without fear or shame. I notice when I am judging, and I let go of feeling guilty about my judgment so that I may listen closely to my inner guidance. I remember that my judgment is teaching me about beliefs held within my authentic self. In each moment, I have the freedom to decide if the beliefs I hold serve my well-being. I thank my judgment for bringing my core beliefs to my conscious awareness. I release feelings of guilt for thinking or speaking my judgment. I hear my judgment telling me who I am. Then, I gracefully let go of my judgment as I live my life true to who I am.

In summary, my judgment is my teacher, and I listen attentively. I look in the mirror of my judgment to see my whole self. I stop judging myself harshly for judging. I forgive myself completely. This is loving self-care. This is the journey into living oneness.

Can You Laugh At Yourself?

October 24, 2014 by Dave Fresilli

Fotolia_55328154_Subscription_XXLHealth and fitness-related issues can often come across as serious topics. It takes a committed decision to step up, and to create a lifestyle that is the catalyst toward major changes.

Part of that lifestyle change is the decision to take responsibility for your own health. Part of this is doing your utmost to follow through with your health and fitness goals.

We all have a tendency to buckle in to those feelings of self-criticism when we fall short of following through with our fitness goals. We beat ourselves up for not trying harder. We wish that we were stronger in resisting those temptations to consume those foods that end up damaging our bodies. We think less of ourselves, and this can stir up old patterns of self-doubt and unworthiness. It is during these moments that we need to remain positive, and focus on our goals.

This is a time when we should learn to laugh at the challenges we face on a daily basis! When we see ourselves in a humorous light, we diffuse the power of self-defeating thoughts and feelings that can cripple our ability to grow and advance as healthy, happy human beings.

Allow me to offer one example of how laughing at a situation helped to conquer my food cravings, while turning the whole process into a game.

There are many times when I’m shopping for food and suddenly think, “Man, I would love some ice cream with a piece of pie!” My favorite is pumpkin pie…but everybody has their own button. It is during these moments that I do everything I can to not think about my cravings. I must admit, those cravings can be too hard to resist!

As a way of overcoming this situation, I make sure to have my shopping basket filled with the foods I truly need. I stay away from the aisles that carry poor quality foods that I know I should avoid.

If my cravings are especially intense, I make a game out of my shopping experience. I take this opportunity to boldly stand in front of the ice cream case. I focus on it all and think, ‘if I were to have this sweet treat tonight, what would be the best treat to select?’ I read the labels of every yummy morsel, and I then find the one that calls to me, and put it in my basket. This makes it easier to finish my shopping. Yet, all the while I feel as if I have my favorite, treat waiting for me. By the time I’m ready to check out, I have overcome my desire for the treat, and I have put the ice cream and pie back on the shelf.

Instead of becoming frustrated, and falling into a place of self- judgment, I find a way to laugh at myself, at my old programing, and make a game out of it all!

There are times when we goof up, and allow our old way of thinking to get the better of us. When this happens, learn to laugh at yourself. Get on with creating the life you truly desire. Don’t fall into the trap of self-judgment and unworthiness.

The more you can laugh at your old programing foibles, the faster you will create the health and wellness you desire.

Would you like to understand how these old programs sabotage all your efforts to create the health and fitness you desire?

Here is a complimentary webinar to get you started.

I would love to help you on your journey of health and wellness.

I wish for all of you, Vibrant Health!  Dave

Watching The News

June 2, 2014 by Janet Thomas

Fotolia_64760971_Subscription_Monthly_M

Huey Lewis and the ____…

I can count on one hand the newscasts I have watched in the past two decades. I haven’t consistently watched the news since 1991 when my sole purpose in life was to stay on the planet. Because I was ((((thisclose)))) to saying “adios” by my own hand, I had to, very consciously, make the commitment to myself to live.  In order to do that, I shut out the world, pretty much, to focus on my own healing process.

And what a process it was. Turns out, I didn’t need the news (or television for that matter) at all; my personal programming – riddled with internal mayhem and toxic experiences — was plenty entertaining all by itself! In fact, the goings on in my head needed my attention for a long time. I had preferred to distract myself with others’ fiction and non-fiction stories rather than focusing on my own.

Paying attention to myself and my own needs paid off in countless ways. For one, I came to realize that after watching a news program I was more depressed and scared than I was when it started. That wasn’t good for me. As sensitive as I am, I require lots of love and support, which I learned to give to myself, and I am peaceful and balanced now, rather than depressed and scared. I keep it that way by focusing on things that I find joyous, fun and empowering.

You may feel otherwise about watching a news program; you may not feel like jumping afterwards like I do. However, if you find that you seek more peace, a sense of tranquility or balance in your life in general, here are a few suggestions that can help you do that:

  1. Be willing to spend to quality time with yourself, just to check in. Let it be okay that you think how you think. Releasing judgment is key.
  1. Focus on your experiences in a different way: check in with yourself on how you feel before you watch a particular program, meet with certain people or engage in a specific activity. Afterwards, check in again. Do you feel better, lighter, happier or more empowered?
  1. Do more of what empowers you and less of what depletes you!

You may be surprised by what you will learn about yourself as you shift your focus from worldly matters to personal ones. You may find your inner landscape more lush and beautiful than a rain forest, and the rewards of a deepening personal connection to be satisfying beyond words. By checking in with yourself and becoming your own best cheerleader, you will find that there is no one on the planet more beautiful – or newsworthy–than you!

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