A safe harbor where beliefs are respected and kindness prevails.

A Fresh Look At Coincidences

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Fotolia_56955943_Subscription_Monthly_MPerhaps you have heard the term “There are no coincidences.” It is usually said when there is a
“chance” meeting or phone call that almost seems orchestrated. For example, you think about an old friend, and within five minutes they call you. You go to a new kind of gathering and find many friends there that you know from completely different circumstances. You reach for a book in a bookstore, and there is someone you know reaching for the same book at the same moment.

Pure coincidence?

I pay attention to these seemingly random events and wonder at their meaning. I don’t always know right away but wait to see how things unfold. Years ago I used to run into a woman I worked with at the local farmers market every Saturday. I went at different times each week, and walked a different ‘course,’ but yet there she would be. Many of my friends also went

to this market, but I always just ran into this one woman. I decided to make an effort to get to know her better and found we had many things in common outside work. It was like our souls GPS monitors were directing us to the same

spot at the same time.

And yet this could be called coincidence.

I recently went on a trip to Costa Rica with a tour group, and the first night as a ‘get acquainted’

that was so much like me it was like we had known each other forever. Judith lives in the Yucatan in Mexico and leads spiritual gatherings at her Bed and Breakfast. During our conversations, she shared with me the word “Dios-idencia” … a combination of Dios, which means God, and coincidencia, which means coincidence in Spanish.

For me, my English version is “God-incidence,” a combination of God and coincidence. Now it isn’t likely that we can all agree on who or what God is, but if we can agree that it is an invisible force for good in our lives, then we can accept that

recognize these events as special and worth trying to understand the meaning they have for us.

Why is it important to start to recognize these Godincidences? Because they are just another way of paying attention to our divine guidance system. I do know people who take this to an extreme and try to find meaning in EVERY small event in their lives. I myself just pay attention to the big ones and am in awe when they happen … like meeting Judith. We may never meet again, but I will carry her lovely energy with me the rest of this lifetime … her faith in the divine order of

connection for your career … or finding a resource for your home that makes your life easier. They can be small or really big, but when they happen, and you know when they do, try to get a sense of how you feel at that moment. Let that “feeling” be your guide. Let it tell you if something that happens is just a random event or truly “guided.”

This is a very subtle skill but one that we can all develop. So be on the lookout for these miraculous meetings when you least expect them. Be open to them and acknowledge them for what they are … Godincidences!

Life Lessons In Disguise

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When things are going well, it is easy to remain optimistic. We need only look around to observe the good in our lives. The challenge is remaining positive during difficult times, finding meaning in life’s obstacles. When we are faced with hardships, it is easy to become overwhelmed and question, “Why me?” or “What have I done to deserve this?” But what if there is something valuable to be gained in these challenging times? What if hardships provide us with invaluable lessons that make us stronger, wiser, and enable us to grow emotionally and spiritually? Often, perceived mistakes become our biggest blessings and a difficult situation our greatest opportunity for growth.

The question then becomes, “How do I keep the faith during challenging times?” “How do I trust that perceived mistakes can be blessings in disguise?” An important first step is believing there is a greater order and purpose to life than we see in the present moment, having faith in a higher power, and trusting that the universe or God can help us make peace with difficult times. Believing there is an ebb and flow to life can help us appreciate the “good” and the “bad” and see the value in both. A second step we can take is practicing self-care. When we are feeling down, we often turn to comfort foods and neglect our workout program when this is precisely the time we would benefit the most from looking after ourselves. Make sure you are getting adequate rest and exercise and eating a healthy diet; your body needs the extra care and love. Lastly, adopting a mindset of gratitude can be transformative. It shifts our focus from what has gone wrong to everything that is going right. If we expand our definition of gratitude, we may find ourselves becoming grateful for life’s challenges.

If you are able to keep the faith during difficult times, you will be able to look back on your life and appreciate the lessons, and even the many blessings, that are present in all your experiences. Perhaps losing your job encouraged you to start your own business and pursue what you are passionate about. The loss of a relationship led you to look within and learn more about yourself and what you want from life. The death of a loved one led you to explore your spiritual beliefs and come to an understanding that we are more than our physical bodies.
In order to receive these important life lessons, we must be open-minded, not get so wrapped up in our current situation that we fail to see the possibilities that surround us, challenge our definition of what it means to live a meaningful life, and understand that within every experience there is a life transforming lesson we can choose to receive.

Old Words, New Meanings…

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During the 20th century, we had the opportunity to be made fully aware of ALL the different cultures in the world, all the different religions, all the different ways there are to be human. What a rich tapestry we as humans weave!  Because of that global exposure, we now see that each culture has its own definition of certain words…really big words, like GOD, LOVE, FAMILY, HONOR, JUSTICE. But beyond our current education/exposure, we each also carry deep inside our consciousness what those words meant to our specific ancestry.  Those beliefs are so ingrained it us that we most often aren’t even aware of them.

Fotolia_40307467_Subscription_Monthly_MFor some of us, what we believe certain words to mean may be holding us back from a chance to shift away from the beliefs of our ancestors, beliefs that were practical for a completely different time that but no longer serve the modern mind. They are so powerful that we may be avoiding using them or even thinking about them.  It can be frightening because on some level, we believe that if we go “against” those rules of order, we will suffer, we will be punished. So how do we feel “safe” in exploring other possibilities? Many of us don’t think about them at all.  We in the West live in a very materialist world for the most part these days…so it is just easier to avoid thinking about certain things and get on with our daily commute to work or dinner plans.

One of the words that has always befuddled me is LOVE.  We all understand what personal love is…even if we don’t have it at the moment. Parent to child, lover to lover, human to pet dog…you know what I mean.  But so many spiritual teachers use the word today with a broader meaning and I find it confusing.  They talk about it as a “thing” that exists, outside the personal.  That it is a power that connects us all, that it is “All there is.”  Huh?  How can that be the same thing as what I feel for my husband, my niece?  Well, short of coming up with a new and more descriptive word about that “energy that is all that is”, last year I found this description that really solved my quandary, and here it is:

“Love is not a feeling.  Love is a spiritual energy.

Love is pure creative energy at its highest level

Love expressed in human form actualizes your Divine Self.”

                                                 – Barbara King

I love “actualizes your Divine Self.” I hope you find this helpful the next time you hear someone talking about “love” in this context. Or if you can come up with a better word so the two aren’t confused, please let me know!

Another word I have always had trouble with is GOD.  Deep in my thinking, I believe that GOD is an all-powerful being outside myself that can pick and choose who has abundance and joy, and who starves and suffers.  Every culture for as long as we have recorded history believes that their GOD controls their lives and they must be honored or even worshiped in some way for personal self-protection.

Now, in this time, because I see how many different “Gods” are worshiped in how many different ways around the world, I needed a new description.  I needed a description that would bring control of my life back to me…at least a little bit!  So I came up with this:

G.O.D.  Gridwork Of Divinity

If you can imagine a network of energy around the planet…one that glows with life…one that is dynamic, moving, creating. Then imagine that you can “connect” with that grid and feed and receive energy from it. Also visualize that this grid can ONLY carry positive energy in it…nothing negative. Imagine that the energy there is Divine…omnipresent in its beauty and power to protect and manifest.  That is a vision or definition of G.O.D. that makes sense to me…that I can participate with, not be dominated by. I am part of it and it is part of me.

If you have a good relationship with your God, this doesn’t take anything away from that…because deep down it is all the same thing.

From in my twenties, I started using the word “Light” as a synonym for both Love AND God!  You will see it used more and more…and iN a way I believe that it does represent both Love and God. There is light, and there is darkness or absence of light. I believe in the places where there is an absence of light bad things can happen.  I try to flow “light” to every situation I can. Many people are able to “see” energy (light) in living things.  I can’t…wish I could, but I can’t…not yet anyway.  But I can “feel” it in certain people.  I can feel an abundance of light and life or an absence of it, in which case they feel “cold” to me. So is “shedding light” on a situation the same as praying for a good outcome?  I kind of think so.

I hope you find these thoughts about a couple of words that have vexed me for a long time helpful.  I am guessing that if these words bothered me, they might have bothered a few other people too, so I hope you find this useful.

I would love to hear from you.  I feel called to help people connect with their Divine selves so they can make the best decisions in their lives…so that they can be and feel love of the highest order…so they can be their own happiness generators and know that true happiness comes from within, not from an outside source.

Write to me at voiceofyoursoul@gmail.com

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