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Your Higher Self

June 17, 2013 by Robbie Adkins

RobbieOver the last decade or two, the term “higher self” has become more and more popular. I have been working on a definition of what the higher self is for close to 40 years now, and I would like to share with you what I believe it is and a simple technique to access it.

I think of it as an electromagnetic field that is part of all your bodies. It could be called your soul body. By “all your bodies,” I mean your physical, emotional, and mental bodies, along with your soul body. These bodies each work independently of each other and yet, as part of your whole being, have an affect on each other. Various cultural influences may have taught us that one of these bodies is more important than the other, but in fact, they are all important. For instance, if your mother was a professor, she might have taught you that the mind, or the mental body, was most important…more important than your emotions or your physical activities. If you came from a family of athletes, it is possible you might have been taught to “stuff” your emotions and develop your physical body. And if your family was particularly passionate, your mental and physical abilities might have been ignored. There are a variety of religions that teach that the spiritual body or soul body is the only one that matters, and that the others, the more material ones, are to be “overcome” by spiritual practices. None of these approaches is to be judged as right or wrong…they just are what they are.

Think of the three bodies as a car and your higher self or soul body as a GPS guidance system that adjusts to conditions around you as your drive (your day) unfolds. It is sending and receiving sort of radio signals at all times, whether you are aware of it or not. The quality of those signals depends on how well integrated it is with your other bodies. When in alignment and when acknowledged, the higher self can connect you to all sorts of higher forms of knowledge that are outside your particular experience but that are always available to you. Those thoughts might be experienced as “intuition.” I believe it can be your direct connection to divine energies that are available to you. When you are saved from some kind of disaster by being in the right place at the right time, you might call that divine intervention, but I would call it being connected to your higher self and listening to it…even without your conscious awareness. Divine energies cannot interfere with your free will, so only by listing to your “divine radio station” can there be divine intervention.

Getting back to the other bodies, let me try to explain them and how to tune into each one, making this grand alignment possible for you. First let us start with the easiest one to identify, the physical body. That means the bones and muscles and blood running through our veins. If we are in physical pain, we know it can really affect our temperament. Conversely, if we have just had a great work-out and our body is fully “awake,” that state of physical being can put us in a great mood, open and ready to face any challenges and to appreciate any good things that might come our way. The process to isolate and experience the physical body is a simple one. Just sit or stand in a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed and ask your physical body how it feels at the moment. Does it want to move? Is it tense? Is it relaxed and flexible? Try to identify just your physical self, separate from any emotions you might attach to how you feel physically. It is how you feel physically, not emotionally. Ask how the physical body feels and what it needs… then just listen for a moment.

Next let us tackle trying to feel our emotional body as separate from our physical body. Sit or stand quietly a minute to identify the state of your emotional body. It may be frightened or happy, unhappy or joyful…or it may feel likely a combination of many feelings. I feel it is wise to “tune in” and ask several times during the day because the emotional body can shift very quickly, more quickly than the other bodies. You may learn some interesting things about yourself and your life. For instance, if you have a weekly office meeting, what is your emotional state right before you go into the meeting? Are you excited and eager to share ideas or progress on a project, or are you uncomfortable as if you are about to go into battle?

The third body is the mental, and that is a bit hard for most of us to separate from the emotional. By mental, I mean how your brain and your whole nervous system is working at the moment. Many years ago I learned about the biorhythm system, as it was the “system de jour.” You can research it on Wikipedia and decide for yourself if it is valid, but by using that system and noting when my “mental cycle” was above or below par, I learned to observe that there was quite a bit of variance in my ability to think. Some days I was “sharper” than others and some days I was just plain dull. Some days I had many brilliant ideas in a row and could problem solve at breakneck speed, while other days I made mistakes with the most simple mathematical calculations. The process to identify the condition of your mental body is the same as the others. Sit or stand quietly where you won’t be disturbed, ask to experience the state of your mental body at this point in time and then ask what it needs.

The final step in this process, after you have asked each body how it is functioning and what it needs today, is to ask to bring the bodies into focus with each other and then invite in the higher self, the soul body, to integrate with them all. I usually feel a deep sense of relaxation with this final step, and I just enjoy it for a moment.

This technique allows you to use all your senses to move through the day with the most accurate picture of what is going on around you. Think of it as like when you go to the eye doctor and he flips various lenses in front of your eye to get the sharpest image. This works the same way. If all your “bodies” have been acknowledged as part of the whole team, each part being as important as the others, and you have asked them to cooperate with each other, and you have asked for your higher self to flow into the other bodies, you’ve got it! It may take some time in the beginning, but eventually, you can just remember this process and it can happen in just a few seconds, in any environment. It is a simple task that promises great rewards!

Staying Fluffy

June 17, 2013 by Regina Cates

ReginaYou are part of a hurry-up, rush-around world where too often good manners and courteous behavior take a back seat to rudeness and instant gratification. You can choose to allow the actions of other people to negatively impact you. Or you can refuse to let other people’s behavior ruffle your fur by choosing to stay fluffy.

As children, my sister and I had a pet rabbit named Honey Bunny, a tiny ball of soft, fluffy white fur. She was cute, cuddly, and consistently calm. When I encounter a tense circumstance, or want to keep from being sucked into other people’s negativity, I repeat “fluffy bunny, fluffy bunny, fluffy bunny” over and over in my head.

It really works. I let go of any frustration or resentment and cannot stay annoyed when I concentrate on a cute little bunny rabbit.

One day I was walking back from a neighborhood shop when I witnessed a driver stopped in the middle of the intersection, talking on the phone while presumably waiting to turn left. After the light turned red she proceeded into the intersection. Although there were signs indicating U-turns were illegal, she chose to do it anyway. Her SUV was too large to make it on the first attempt, so she had to back up and move forward repeatedly.

Drivers at the green light laid on their horns, while many of the pedestrians who were forced to wait on the sidewalk screamed at her. The woman gestured through her windshield with a rude hand signal, continued chatting on the phone, and maneuvered into the illegal turn to take a parking space in front of a certain store.

Throughout this incident I stood on the sidewalk, a silent witness to how the actions of one person inconvenienced and angered dozens of others. No matter how the woman behaved, or how those impacted by the woman reacted, I was determined not to allow the circumstance to ruin my good mood. I was focused on staying fluffy.

On another occasion, I was experiencing greater pain than usual from two previous back surgeries. I decided to consult an orthopedic specialist to see if anything could be done to alleviate the pain.

The specialist entered the room without introducing himself and quickly asked what was wrong. As I began recounting the history of my back surgeries, as I had with other doctors, he interrupted me. “Do not talk to a physician that way,” he said. “Wait until you are asked specific questions and then answer as quickly as possible. We are busy people.”

I politely cut the examination short and left. No matter how shocking or arrogant the physician’s behavior was, I was determined to stay fluffy.

Occasionally you will encounter people like the woman in the SUV or the physician who are unconcerned with how their actions negatively impact other people. You can ask yourself, “How does angrily ego-reacting to the rude, but not physically threatening, behavior of another person really benefit me?”

How other people choose to behave is their choice. You have the same choice.

Yes, you can be led by hurt feelings or wounded pride to impulsively fire something back, and there are many situations when it is appropriate and important to stand up for what is right. Yet, when you egotistically call people on their own self-centered behavior, it is not likely they will say, “Wow! Thank you so much. You have allowed me to see how badly I acted.”

Rarely, if ever, do situations like this turn out the way our ego wants. Few of us appreciate being told when we have behaved badly. Many times we already realize our behavior is inappropriate. Even if we are embarrassed and ashamed, instead of stopping to question and assume responsibility for our behavior, we may instead allow our wounded egocentric pride to shoot the messenger.

Remaining positive and peaceful under stressful circumstances requires bringing a different level of awareness to the situation than that which creates it in the first place. I learned it is necessary to have a plan, something to focus on to keep my ego from becoming caught up in nerve-racking situations or other people’s self-absorbed behavior.

Next time you encounter someone who is rude, find yourself stuck in a traffic jam, or discover that someone has backed into your parked car, refuse to add any negative energy to an already uncomfortable occurrence. You cannot change an incident after it happens. You do not have the power to change other people or make them see things about their behavior they are not willing to accept for themselves. Instead, focus on behaving in a way you are proud to remember by imagining something peaceful and calm that helps you stay fluffy!

How other people choose to behave is their choice. You have the same choice.

Take a Mind Breath

June 17, 2013 by Cindy Hively

HivelyWhat does taking a MIND BREATH mean? The way I define taking a mind breath is to bring yourself back to center. A mind breath allows us to calm, clear and release difficulties in the present moment. When we are following this practice we are able to surrender to joy, peace, contentment and courage. This is the miracle of equanimity, the balance that allows us to live and handle wisely all of life’s moments. It is impossible for our mind to hold pain, life difficulties and joy at the same time.

We can make things difficult for ourselves by being hesitant or uncertain. When we earnestly set our mind on getting in touch with our own breath and following it as far as it can take us, we will enter the stage of liberating insight, leading to the mind itself. Ultimately, pure knowing will stand out on its own. That’s when we reach an attainment trustworthy and sure. In other words, if we let the breath follow its own nature, and the mind its own nature, the results of taking a -mind breath- practice will without a doubt be all that we hope for.

When does one use MIND BREATH in life? This is a simple answer, everyday and through out the day. Before I even step one foot on the floor when I awaken in the morning, I inhale deeply and exhale slowly; I do this practice five times. This practice allows us to release all the toxins and mind chatter so we can create space for our mind to hold goodness as we start our day. I can feel your mind wheels turning. I know some are thinking, “my life is in crisis, I just lost my job, my boss doesn’t like me, the economy is not good, I have an illness and I am late with bills, my spouse just left me, I feel no one cares.” I can tell you your breath cares and so does your mind. Learning how to use your mind and breath together through difficulties has scientific proof that we can lower our cortisol levels (this is our flight/fight response) and raise our serotonin levels (this is our joy, contentment, feel good and wise response).

I could list pages of life difficulties. I know I have my share too. These are real life problems and most of the time they can be ego based. Last week as I was going through old boxes and junk in the attic, I became extremely overwhelmed. Do you know the emotion I am talking about? Thinking something should be easier and then realizing it is just one huge mess. We all have these experiences from day to day. Life is difficult but learning how to use MIND BREATH brings insight that comes solely through daily faithful practice.

How do you take a MIND BREATH in daily life? Most of us, by and large, like getting results but don’t like laying the groundwork to learn a new skill. We are creatures of habit, aren’t we? We may want nothing but goodness and ease (who doesn’t) but if we haven’t prepared the groundwork, we will not have change. When we feel stressors or difficulties in our day, we need to stop, pay attention and begin with cleansing breaths by engaging our mind.

As you practice you will make adjustments that will serve you well. Knowing how to adjust the breath so that it eases the mind and soothes the body does require practice. Learning how to breathe so that you feel free and refreshed in breath and mind is the hope of your personal exploration into this practice. The truth with this practice is that it can be practiced anywhere, at anytime and anyplace. There is no right or wrong. We naturally settle into what benefits us. We just have to start somewhere and begin without judgment..

My hope is that this practice of MIND BREATH will be helpful in your day to day experiences and you will come to see the great benefits that come from keeping the breath in mind. Always remember practice makes progress not perfection.

AN EXERCISE IN MIND BREATH PRACTICE

Getting Started:

  • Lie flat on your back and close your eyes. You may also do this practice sitting or standing. I do this practice before getting out of bed each morning. Ahhhh!
  • Place your right hand on your abdomen and keep your left hand resting at your side.
  • Relax your whole body, your face, neck, shoulders, back, arms and legs.
  • Inhale deeply through the nose and feel your abdomen rise and expand.
  • When you’ve inhaled fully, pause for a moment and then exhale fully through your nose.
  • As you exhale, feel your abdomen contract. Let yourself go, imagine your whole body going limp.
  • Repeat the breath; take 10-20 deep breaths in total.
  • When you are finished, roll on your right side and rest for a few moments before pushing up to a seated position.

What to Consider:

  • Pause during inhalation and exhalations keeping the throat soft and relaxing the entire body
  • Keep your breath smooth and regular throughout the exercise
  • The exhalation should take twice as long as the inhalation
  • If you become distracted and your mind starts to wander away from your breath (and it will) notice this and let it go. You will now start focusing on your breath and belly again.

Moving Beyond Heartbreak

June 9, 2013 by Shann VanderLeek

ShanntnLast year, I summoned the courage to forgive myself and my father after almost ten years estranged.

Witnessing an alcohol fueled argument between my father and step mother in the summer of 2002 triggered a flood of painful emotions I had buried deep inside for most of my life. I decided in that moment that my father was out of control for the last time in my presence. As a new mother, I made the choice to protect my young daughter and myself from a narcissistic, often mean-spirited, “Jekyll and Hyde” character who happened to be my Dad.

As a transformational coach and self-care enthusiast, I believe we must learn to create safe boundaries to honor and protect ourselves. We subconsciously erect protective walls around our hearts to insulate ourselves from the pain and trauma we once endured. The good news is that we can remove the barriers within that keep us from experiencing compassionate self-care.

Over the last 10 years, I’ve learned that you can heal your past, open your heart and experience more joy. In my experience, forgiveness began my cycle of personal healing. Whether through coaching, counseling, or facing things on our own, there is deep emotional healing that must be attended to in order to reach a place where the old story is no longer the only story.

I believe that when each one of us heals and forgives ourself, we invite a profound shift in compassion for ourselves and the world. When you experience compassion and trust, you feel loved. You’re at home in your body, and your relationships with yourself and others are at their best.

A significant part of the sacred process for letting go of an emotionally difficult past includes practicing yoga, sacred communication exercises and an understanding of the Sacred Heart Healing Cycle.

Yoga

Yoga means “Union” – the union of the mind, body, and spirit with the Divine. Practicing Yoga quite literally transformed my life. From my first gentle yoga class, through my teacher training, and teaching Luscious Living Yoga playshops, Yoga has remained the perfect way for me to access peace and tranquility while calling up repressed emotions and facing the scary monsters under my bed.

If you want to get to the root of what is weighing you down, drop in on an introductory Yoga class and get back in touch with your body, mind and spirit.

Sacred Heart Healing CycleSacredHeartHealingCycle-300x157

Your heart is at the core of your beautiful spirit, where you can open up and connect with infinite joy and peace. The health of your heart registers the quality of love in your life.

When we choose love, fear melts away. Love is the greatest healer of all. The most powerful way to open, energize and care for your heart is to learn to love yourself and others without judgment. Be yourself. Let others be who they are. Be mindful of the number of times each day you judge yourself. Simply notice your rambling inner critic, thank her for her opinion, and ask her to sit down and be quiet.

I created the Sacred Heart Healing Cycle to help you identify with some of the feelings you may be experiencing within the cycle. Each emotion represents a part of your experience and can be attributed to your overall upbringing, parent-child relationships, school experiences, romantic relationships, professional relationships, and your relationship with yourself.

The cycle begins with the abundant flow of pure loving energy we are born with. We are shiny and new. Innocent. As we grow up, we endure personal experiences of heartbreak, pain, and wounding. If we’ve been a victim of abuse and significant loss, trusting ourselves and others can seem unfathomable.

When we decide that we no longer want to suffer, we summon the courage to heal our precious hearts. We can return to innocence and complete the cycle.

Below, I’ve categorized the feelings and behaviors of which you should be mindful during each part of the Sacred Heart Healing Cycle.

Where are you in this cycle? Can you identify with some of the feelings? What do you know you need to do to support the feeling you’re experiencing right now?

You can set yourself free from attachment to the trauma that comes with a painful past. The best thing you can do right now is forgive yourself and forgive everyone else who’s ever done you harm. Carrying the weight of a painful past is like committing an act of violence against yourself, every day. Imagine being rid of the burden, anger and grudges you’ve toted along with you over the years. How would it feel to let them all go? I can tell you from experience that it feels incredible.

Sacred Communication

Communicating directly from the heart with ourselves and others takes practice. If you are ready to practice sharing your truth, here are a couple exercises to get you in the flow of sincere communication.

Rage Letter

Write a letter to the one(s) who hurt you. Let your angry feelings fill the page. Rant, scream, cry. Get it all out. When you can’t write another word, bless your letter and then burn it in a burn barrel or fireplace.Bless it and Burn it! Let it go. You will feel so much better. There is no resting place for rage in your beautiful heart.

Forgiveness Letter 

Write a letter of forgiveness to yourself (or someone else). Identify what is haunting you and pour your heart out on the page. Squeeze out every detail of how you feel about the ghost(s) of your past. Forgive yourself for everything. Forgive everyone who’s done you harm. You deserve to let go of the pain and suffering that comes with holding a grudge. You do not have to beat yourself up any longer. You deserve the freedom that comes with forgiveness.

HealingCycleBehaviors

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