A safe harbor where beliefs are respected and kindness prevails.

Who Is It You Desire To Become?

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Fotolia_4656516_Subscription_LMost of us have little problem answering the question “what do you want in life”?

Some will say wealth, and some will say true love. Others will say health, a beautiful home, a nice car, or a successful career, or a family.

All are perfectly good answers and there is no reason why they cannot be achieved.

When I ask clients “Who Is It You Desire To Become” most have to take time to process the question. After a few moments, many say they are fine with whom they are, they just want a better life. They will then proceed to describe many of the above conditions, which they feel will produce this better life.

It usually starts with “ Well if I only …(fill in the blank) then I would be happy”. Then the description of the conditions would follow.

What is not being understood and accepted here is that conditions must follow conditioning. In other words, for you to acquire something in your life you must set the conditions within yourself first. It is only then that you will have the ability to create what you desire to become.

Possibly you have heard the example about attracting love. It is said, “ You must become the person you want to attract.” If I desire to attract a loving, affectionate, beautiful, funny, … (I have a long list) woman as my soul mate, then I must become this within myself. You will attract that which you believe yourself to be.

The same goes for all your desires in life. If you desire wealth, happiness, and health, then you must know yourself as such. By becoming what you desire you become a magnet.

I ask you now. Who Is It You Desire To Become? If you cannot give a description in perfect detail along with the feeling of already having it, then you are just treading water.

This is the first place I start when working with a new client. I don’t go much further until the client knows what he or she desires in their health, fitness, and wellness.

This statement is a declaration of what we together are going to achieve. From this statement we can then create a plan to move forward.

People are afraid to really let go and admit to what they desire, because they realize there will be some work to do on their part to achieve it. They are right of course, but what is so off-putting to some work if it will create the life you have always desired?

You are not meant to dream and sit on your hands all day in hope that it will just happen. That’s not how it’s done, not if you want to experience it in the physical world.

Interestingly, so many of us go to work for someone else and work our tails off, while thinking “I should be doing this for myself”. In this case you are working for someone else’s dream are you not?

We need to create the motivation within ourselves to become who we desire to be. Taking this action is going to be a bit uncomfortable for many, but so worth it.

I encourage you to take the time to find a quite space away from all distractions, and begin to express who you desire to become. Not what you want, those are just things. I want you to step out and ask yourself “Who do I really want to become? What would it feel like to be this person? What would my life be like?”

Write it all down in as much detail as possible. Describe the feelings that go along with this new you. Then I want you to refine the statement into a paragraph. Make it in the present tense as if you are living it right now.

When you’re done with this I want you to email me your “Statement of Gratitude” for your new life. In the subject line of the email write “Who I Desire To Become”.

I will choose the 5 best statements, and email you back with tips and directions for the next step.

Here’s a clue. Part of who you desire to be should include your health, fitness, or wellness.

I can’t wait to read your “Who I Desire To Become”.

I wish for you Vibrant Health.

David Fresilli – C.H.E.K. Holistic Health Practitioner / Corrective Exercise Specialist

Want to work with David? Contact him here:

Holistic Health & Fitness

David@holistic.health.fitness00@gmail.com

www.holistichealth-fitness.com

Telephone: 541-941-8800

You Deserve A Break – Bliss Break!

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We’ve multitasked our way right out of the present moment” says Thomas Crum, author of Three Deep Breaths.

soaking up the sun at Eastern MarketWhere is the bliss in that? Reconnecting with our bliss is essential to creating peace in our lives and summer offers a great opportunity to live lightly! You don’t need a 10 day vacation in the islands (okay, I admit that might be nice as the weather changes), you can start right now creating inner harmony, making room for less stress, by taking much-needed bliss breaks.

Here are 7 tips to make your life a little more soul-cial:

1. Breathe deep at least 3 times per day – Stop whatever you are doing at least 3 times per day and take three slow, deep purposeful breaths – filling your lungs with oxygen and your soul with life. This brings a sense of inner tranquility and can soothe away any tension, frustration and anxiety.

2. Take a 15 minute walk, preferably in nature – Simply walk at a pace that feels comfortable to you. Pay attention to the ebb and flow of the natural world. There is a sweet sensation that comes over us when we observe the synchronicity of life through animals and plants. One of the coolest things to observe during summer is a firefly/lightning bug as it flits around a yard.

3. Remove one thing from your life that is non-essential – We fill our time with non-essential “stuff”. Think about what you do on a daily basis, ask yourself is it really bringing you joy? Eliminate one thing that feels daunting and taxing.

4. Laugh, laughter feeds the soul – Watch your favorite comedy; write down and relive the funniest thing that ever happened to you or simply sit and laugh. Laughter helps you take things lightheartedly and is one of the best forms of medicine. Bonus…it’s FREE! I dare you to look in the mirror and take 60 seconds to simply laugh with yourself!

5. Listen to music everyday – Turn on your favorite tunes and listen. Sing if it makes you feel good, out loud if you can. Focusing on music can reduce pain, decrease depression and bring about a sense of calm. Grab the microphone and pretend you’re Sheryl Crow belting out “I’m gonna soak up the sun!”

6. Practice gratitude – Look forward to every day and be grateful for each moment. In any given minute we can find something to be grateful for; sometimes we simply don’t see it. Start a gratitude journal, share with your friends what you are thankful for, including them, practice saying, “Thank you” more often, or, as my friend and colleague Dr. John W. Beiter says, “Write at least one Thank You note to someone every day!”

7. Of course, Smile! No explanation needed!

Are you ready to soak up the sun and take a bliss break?

Connect with the Spirit of your Inner Child

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Fotolia_5492051_Subscription_LEach of us has an inner child who is longing to come out and play; to laugh, be silly, have fun and enjoy life. Our inner child is the curious, fun-loving part of our personality that seeks spontaneity and adventure. It wants to explore all that life has to offer with an open mind and heart. It knows how to have fun for the sake of having fun. Our inner child unapologetically embraces who we are, perceived flaws and all. When you connect with the spirit of your inner child healing takes place, leaving more room for joy, peace, and fun in your life.

One of the best ways to connect with your inner child is to do the things you are passionate about. So often the things we care about the most get pushed aside as we get swept up in our daily to-do lists packed with things we feel we have to do, instead of want to do. Become very clear about what matters most to you and make an effort to have your daily activities be a reflection of these things. Start taking note of the activities and people who put a smile on your face and fill your heart with joy. Notice the times when you are feeling at your best; what are you thinking? What are you doing? Who are the people around you?

To truly make your inner child smile it can be helpful to reflect on the things you enjoyed doing during childhood. What were your favorite activities? Did you have an imaginary friend? What toys did you like to play with? What games were you drawn toward? It can also be helpful to reflect on your childhood dreams. Did you envision yourself as an artist creating breathtaking paintings for the world to see? Did you imagine yourself as a teacher sharing your knowledge and wisdom with others? Childhood dreams may be expressed differently today but there are still ways to honor them. For instance, if you wanted to be a singer you could join a choir or go to karaoke. If you had dreams of becoming an actress you could take an acting class, or try out for a local play. Looking over childhood pictures can help trigger memories of things you enjoyed doing. Thinking back to these earlier years can provide insight into things you may still enjoy today but have not made time for.

So what stops us from letting our inner child play? Often we feel we need to hold ourselves back. We remain composed, serious, and ‘adult-like.’ Or we get so weighed down in the demands of daily life that there seems to be no room for fun. It is true that we have daily responsibilities and at times we need to step into our adult shoes, but it does not mean that we need to leave our inner child behind. Allowing our childlike spirit to shine through makes us more open-minded, joyful, creative, and productive. It can even make our daily routine seem more interesting. Through the eyes of a child everything is a new, exciting adventure, full of possibilities. Every situation is made more enjoyable with a little imagination.

When you allow your inner child to shine through you will see the world with new eyes; eyes of love, positivity, and joy. Give your inner child the love and approval that it is longing for by making sure your self-talk is supportive and encouraging, honoring the unique, beautiful person that you are. Don’t take yourself so seriously. Be silly, laugh, and have fun. Let the spirit of your inner child shine through in all that you do and your daily life will be transformed in many magical, fun ways.

What Is Constant And What Is Moving?

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fotolia_816374_Subscription_LA friend of mine was thinking about re-painting her living room because she is not in love with the original color she selected. Although everyone she asks loves it, she was still lukewarm about it.

When we talked about it, which was often, I told her to trust her instincts and make a decision. That didn’t help because she couldn’t make up her mind and she would still talk about not totally loving the color. While listening to her, sometimes I would think, “C’mon, make a decision already.” But she wouldn’t.

As I was driving one day and thinking about how we, in general, vacillate about things (and of course I am no exception!), the light bulb went on in my head.   This is a classic example of the idea spoken by Anais Nin – “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.”

My theory is that my friend’s mood is already in place when she opens her front door at the end of her workday.  And how she perceives the paint color is dependent upon her mood. When she’s in a good mood, she feels good about the paint job. When she is cranky, she doesn’t like it.

I discussed this idea with her and invited her to do an experiment: for five days she would observe what kind of mood she is in before she opens the front door, and to gauge how she feels about the paint after she opens the front door.

The results were:

Day 1 – She was tired but felt okay, the paint looked just okay.

Day 2 – She was peaceful and the paint looked pretty good.

Day 3 – She was cranky and the paint looked terrible.

Day 4 – She was happy and felt pretty good about the room.

Day 5 – She was happy and the paint job was okay.

Afterwards, she told me that this had been a beneficial exercise for her. Although overall she was okay about the paint color, she wasn’t truly in love with it. She thought that if she came home and was cranky, ideally, she wanted to be cheered up by the room. Therefore, she got the clarity she felt she needed and decided to change the paint color.

And there it was. She was true to her decision and changed the color of the paint, and she has been very happy with it ever since.

I appreciated going through that exercise with her because I learned a lot about myself as well. There were times when she talked to me about the color of the paint and I was okay with hearing about it for the umpteenth time, and other times I felt so annoyed about it. She was, at all times, being her truest self, and, it was my own mood that was the driver on how I felt about our interaction.

When I’m cranky, many things look bleak or damaged. However, when I’m feeling good and balanced, those very same things appear to be just fine. So, what is constant and what is moving? I am moving. All of the time. The thing I am thinking about, whatever it is, is existing in its truest state, and it is me who is changing. My perception is changing, based upon how I am feeling at the moment.

If you are willing, try this for yourself. First observe your mood and then notice how you feel about someone or something. Chances are your mood will impact your perception. Again, everyone and everything is just being itself and you are the one who is doing the perceiving. And based upon your mood, your perception may change.

Finally, when you find yourself happy and balanced, chances are you will be at peace with everything and everyone around you.

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