A safe harbor where beliefs are respected and kindness prevails.

Speak From The Heart

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Speak from the heart

The words we speak, including to ourselves, reveal a lot about us and directly contribute to our own level of happiness. That means our attitudes, beliefs, feelings, and expectations are directly affected by our own words and how we say them

“Expressing words through our heart is an illustration of our soul voice.” Natalie Hennessy

Our words not only communicate what we want others to hear, they have the power to influence and impact the people in our lives. We can use our words to encourage and motivate, just as easily as we can use them to weaken or defeat.

In the Five Mindfulness Teachings world famous Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh says, “Knowing that words can create happiness or suffering I am committed to speaking truthfully using words that inspire confidence, joy, and hope.” When we speak from the heart, we show that we care about ourselves and the person we are in direct dialogue with.

How do we begin speaking and thinking from the heart?

Choose to speak with love. Making a conscious choice to speak with love, including to ourselves, takes patience and practice. Like a stone begin tossed in a pond, once we begin, the ripples are endless.

Action step 1: Begin with yourself! What does your internal dialogue look like? Often we say things like, “I’m not good enough” or “That was a really stupid thing for me to do”. Recognize what you are saying to yourself and how you say it. Choose to use positive internal dialogue and look at the world that way, too.

Think about and write two positive statements about yourself that you are willing to affirm and act on every day. You are replacing a negative thought you may have had about yourself with a positive one. Your mind can just as easily recognize positives; you may not believe it at first, however, think it often enough and you will believe it and become it! Create your own feel good affirmations.

Action step 2: Practice speaking, with love. Dr. Rick Shaffer, creator of “Extreme Thought Makeover says, “Speak to no one of what displeases you, not even yourself” When in a conversation (including a conversation with yourself) envision every word as if it were coming right through your heart center, gently flowing off the tip of your tongue. See the person you are engaging with through eyes of compassion and kindness. Notice the difference from past conversations and any new patterns that emerge. Write them down. (The written word is so powerful and permanent.)

Action step 3: Complement more than complain. Pay attention to what you say to people. Do you tell your wife/husband/partner what a great job she/he did on dinner? Or your children how much you love being with them after school; how much their mere presence makes you smile? Or your husband/wife/partner how much you appreciate his/her efforts of taking such good care of the family?

Wayne Dyer says, “Change your thoughts, and change your life”. Change your words, change your life and enhance the lives of everyone on your path.

 

Thanksgiving Anew

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Fotolia_51963380_Subscription_Monthly_MIn the last year, my husband lost his last immediate family member. Most years, our Thanksgiving was spent with his parents or sister, and now they are all gone. For a moment, for this first year, that left an empty feeling in us about this holiday…usually so full of family sharing and catching up…and laughter…and good food.

We don’t have children so there is no connection there…and for many who do have children, they start to go off with their spouses families as time goes by…so that isn’t always an available connection that can be counted on.

At first I was sad as I have big emotional expectations for that particular day. It my childhood, it was always a very happy day with no punishment or arguing. It was good to process that not having immediate family to share it with was a real loss, a genuine grief. I started wracking my brain to think of ANYONE we could invite to spend Thanksgiving with us so I could fill my house with the smell of a roasting turkey. But there are some events that must be genuine and can’t be “recreated” with a new cast of characters. So, what to do.

My brother has been going to an in-law’s house for the last several years with a HUGE group of people we didn’t really know. That didn’t feel like something we wanted to do. Technically we are distant family, but that is not the same as being with people who you know, that you have spent years with.

Then it occurred to me that we could go to the local soup kitchen and serve food to the homeless. THAT felt awesome…genuine good feeling…not recreated feelings. I asked my husband and to my surprise he thought that was a good idea! So the energy shifted. The sadness had to be processed to make way for a new light, a new joy. fotolia_23798303_Subscription_L

I think at this holiday time of year it is important to be honest with ourselves so we can move on to a new experience. If it makes you sad, then be honest with yourself about it, then let it go, and think of something NEW to do for this holiday that would make YOU feel good. The idea of serving people who needed a meal felt very, very good.

As it turns out, my brother is going to have Thanksgiving at his house this year, so we have a place to go after all. But even if we hadn’t had that offer, we were ready for a NEW Thanksgiving. Also I happened to see a cooking show about roasting just a turkey breast with gobs of herbed butter under the skin, so I plan to do that the day after Thanksgiving so we can have left over turkey…the BEST turkey!

The important thing about this special day is to be thankful for what ever we have in our lives. It may even be less that what we used to have, or more. But being in a state of gratitude, no matter where you have your meal, or with whom you have it, is really what this day is about…and it feels awesome. Enjoy!

Gratitude: The Quickest Way to Boost your Mood

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When you arise in the morning, give thanks for the morning light, for your life and strength. Give thanks for your food and the joy of living. If you find no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies in yourself – Tecumseh, Shawnee Native American Leader

One of the quickest ways to welcome more happiness and optimism into your life is to practice gratitude. Gratitude is a feeling we experience by noticing, and being thankful for, the blessings in our life. It can greatly transform our overall feelings of well-being. People who regularly practice gratitude experience better physical and mental health. We cannot experience negative emotion if we are feeling thankful. Gratitude is accompanied by feelings of peace and joy; it has the potential to change our thoughts from lack to abundance.

Anyone can adopt a practice of gratitude. At first it may feel uncomfortable, even insincere, but overtime it becomes easier and much more natural. What we focus on expands, and when we choose to notice our blessings we find more things to be thankful for. You can instantly experience more gratitude in this moment by appreciating the simple things that so many of us take for granted. Appreciate the fresh water that you drink, the warmth of the sun, the air that you breathe. Notice small acts of kindness, like someone holding the door for you, or buying your morning coffee. Practice looking people in the eye and genuinely saying “thank you”. Be specific in your praise. Something as simple as saying to a waitress “thank you for your great service” will help boost their mood as well as your own. Take note of how the feeling of gratitude affects your body. Where do you feel gratitude? What thoughts strongly evoke feelings of gratitude? Practice these thoughts often.

Beginning and ending your day with a gratitude practice will evoke feelings of peace and joy. In the morning, before you get out of bed, take time to be grateful for the day ahead. Be thankful for the fun day at work, or the interesting conversation with a friend. Saying thank you in advance helps to set a positive tone for the day. So often people dread getting out of bed because they are worried about the things that might go wrong throughout the day; instead, practice being grateful for things going smoothly. At the end of each day, when you are lying in bed, think of the best thing that happened that day and say “thank you”. Often times people use the time before bed to reflect on what went wrong throughout their day; what someone said to offend them, how they were disrespected, lied too, etc. Or people spend the time mentally preparing a to-do list for tomorrow. Using this time to reflect on what you are grateful for will help you fall asleep in a positive state of mind.

Gratitude is a way of approaching life. It is a choice we make to focus on the good in each day. Post a list of blessings in your room, and choose to look at it often. Carry a list of blessings in your purse or pocket and look at it when you are feeling down. When we are thankful for what we have, we make room for more good things to come into our experience.

Dancing With The Angels

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One thing I really like about maturity is the amount of experience you have to pull from. La Ricoeta 045Pull what, you may ask? Well, a treasure of happenings, memories and the opportunity for current happenings to garner a deeper meaning. Let me explain.

Recently, my partner Steve and I were visiting our friends Paul Boynton and his partner Mike Wynne, who live in New Hampshire. The first night we were there I had the most incredible dream. I was standing in front of an old wooden table and on the table was a book stand or lectern that held an ancient manuscript. It must have been 36” by 48 “ and it was old. The paper was yellowed crisp parchment. The script was old English from about the 1400 or 1500’s.

(I know this because I studied Old English script in graduate school so I could actually read it. Coincidence or subconscious bleed through?)

On the pages there were prayers to the 9 levels or choirs of angels— the seraphim, cherubim…………..( I grew up Catholic and have a Catholic education through College.)

In the dream I recited each of the these series of prayers to each level of the angelic hierarchy. It was almost as if I were a magician or alchemist calling on the powers of the angels to assist me with a special intention of service I felt compelled to carry out. I knew in my heart that I needed help. Whatever it was I was trying to accomplish required that I surrender to a higher power or powers to bring about the results needed. Whatever I was doing was not about me. I felt like a conduit of some kind and that I was supposed to call on the benevolent assistance of all the angels but especially Michael and Gabriel.

I woke up and laid there with my eyes closed. I was full of this dream and wondered what it meant. This is not my usual type of dream for sure. I tried to meditate to see if I could gather any meaning from the dream before moving into the world that day. My mind and body were so full of the dream and the crisp details of it that it was difficult for me to empty my mind to just be.

When I opened my eyes there on the wall was a beautiful, ornate Russian Icon of Michael, the archangel, also known as The Protector and the Prince of the Seraphim. I had not noticed it the night before because it was behind the door. So we closed the door and turned off the lights and went to bed.

Wow—- there was one of my archangel friends looking down on me. Had I caught a glimpse of him before sleeping and I just didn’t remember? My mind was trying to make sense of the whole experience. But my spirit was not having it. It spoke to me and said breathe. Sit with what you saw and just be with it

I mentioned the dream to my partner Steve and to Mike that morning. We commented on the uniqueness of it and the fact that the icon was hanging there and watching over us all night.

A few days later, and once back home in Cincinnati, I decided to combine my meditation practice and yoga into one. So I sat in the side yard and enjoyed the beautiful summer breeze as it caressed my skin and I lost my self in the stillness and the delicious void of the space between my eyes. I kept getting the image of wings. Was it because I could hear birds all around me? Hmmm…..

I started my yoga practice and each time I did a swan dive forward into a forward bend, I felt as if I had wings. It was all very cool but I was still not sure what was happening with this.

Then I went into savasana, also known as corpse pose- where you lie still and just let everything go. Almost as soon as I closed my eyes I was in a vision of a memory. It was 1993 or 1994. I was in our retail store, LeftHanded Moon on Court Street in Cincinnati OH. Steve was helping a customer who had come in to shop. She brought her one year old twins—- who were getting a little restless. I offered to hold them while she shopped. I had one boy in each arm and bounced them around a bit. As I always do with small children I danced with them in my arms and I asked them to tell me any secrets they might remember from the time before they were born. I remember distinctly both boys looking right at me and just going on and on in unintelligible baby gibberish. They were telling me!! And I had forgotten the language they were using to tell me. I was so excited and wished with all my heart I could understand.

WOW. That memory was brought back so vividly today. And the meaning was not lost on me.

The babies names were Gabriel and Micheal and born on my birthday— some thirty years later but the three of us share January 13 as our nativity.

Let me say it again WOW!! I am still not sure what all this means but I can tell you that I am paying attention. And you can see why I am appreciating my maturity. However it all comes together— my old english studies, catholic background, the experience with the twins in the 1990’s, it all came together last Monday in a house I had never been to, nestled in the woods of New Hampshire where an image of an archangel hangs on a

wall and as I see it, took the opportunity to speak with me through the symbols of a dream.

What does it all mean? I am not sure. but as I finish this article the words- “in my soul I believe I can change the world” are being recited. So how does the Universe talk to us? In so many ways. We just have to have to have our eyes, our ears, our conscious and our subconscious and our Heart open to all possibilities. So in those moments when you feel less than connected to The Universe or Creation or whatever term you use, close your eyes, take a deep breath and ask to be connected and to feel a part of the experience of being alive. Then sit back and pay attention.

The definition of an angel is “a pure spirit created by God”. That is each and every one of us.

I am grateful for all the experiences of my life. I invite you to be also.

Here’s to the mystery and power of love that will have us all change the world.

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