A safe harbor where beliefs are respected and kindness prevails.

Fearless Women – Visions of a New World

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fearlesswomenMary_Ann_cut_out_short-filteredFearless Women – Visions of a New World  

by Mary Ann Halpin

I have always found myself inspired by anyone who has come through a significant life challenge holding their head high. You know the one… the person who takes their tragedy and finds a way to make the world a better place. Fearless Women – Visions of a New World is a collection of the portraits and stories of fifty such fearless women who are answering the question, ”What can each one of us do to make this world a better place?”

Here are a few of the stories that touched me deeply:

  • Cherie B. Mathews, a breast cancer survivor, encourages us to ”be fearless when it comes to our health.” She is the creator of the ”Heal in Comfort” shirt that helps support the physical journey of healing and the spiritual need for comfort and dignity.
  • Karen Mertes’, Lt. Col. (Retired), USAF life changed when a drunk driver traveling at a high speed struck her vehicle. Her career and her life as she knew them were over. Her courage led her to create ”Fulfill Your Destiny,” a non-profit that help others become independent and successful whose life path have been changed by unforeseen circumstances,
  • Kimberly Ness who lost her sister and ten other family members tried to keep normalcy for her family while facing her own cancer diagnosis and the end of a 30-year marriage. She encourages us to see through the sorrow and see the glory of life enduring.

This beautifully photographed and riveting collection of life stories exists to inspire you. Be prepared to hear the message you need to become your fearless self.

Review by Cheryl Maloney.

Growing Beyond Tolerance

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Growing Beyond Tolerance and Into Acceptance

Jordantn

“I know I am not seeing things as they are; I’m seeing things as I am.” –Laurel Lee.

This insight resonates as deep wisdom to me. These words affirm a point of view that I believe is true, yet grasping the idea of the quote I cannot call it ‘the truth.’ The concept clearly reveals that our beliefs are not facts, and it is our personal and collective beliefs that shape and color our entire reality.

During the journey of a lifetime, it’s common to seek answers and to want to know the truth. Many people question our experience of reality. They want to know why we’re here. We often call that a quest for meaning—a search for the truth. On our search for truth, most of us discover and identify our personal beliefs about life, about creation, about humanity, about god, and so on. We often find others who share our beliefs. Sometimes we adopt a rigid position that our personal beliefs are the truth. Then, applying our beliefs we begin to judge, assess, and evaluate all that we experience, observe, and hear. This process is perfectly natural and there is no guilt or shame in it. The process of seeing things as I am allows me to create my entire perception of reality. (This is what I believe. Do you hear me laughing?)

Accepting the difference between facts and beliefs helps me be open to the “truths” of others. I hold a complete canon of beliefs that create my values and govern my behavior. I am more comfortable with diversity when I accept that everyone is free to live life according to his or her own beliefs—just as I do. The more I practice letting go of my urge to defend my beliefs as if they are facts, the easier it is to welcome disagreement and a wide diversity of concepts. Allowing others the same freedom I desire helps me listen more openly to the beliefs held by others. This openness creates space for my personal “truths” to grow. Furthermore, this openness eliminates stress around wanting others to confirm my beliefs—proving I’m right. Even more importantly, when I distinguish between beliefs and facts, I more easily let go of wanting others to conform to my personal beliefs. This works because I have come to accept that my beliefs are not facts. I release notions and feelings telling me that my beliefs equal “the truth”. (As I wrote that, another chuckle occurred.)

For example, I have an unshakable belief that life is everlasting. I know people who believe just as strongly that life is finite. I tell these friends that when they die, come find me and we’ll have a laugh. Then, I admit that if they’re right—I’ll never know, and I laugh now. Neither belief can be proven as fact, so I enjoy living with a belief in eternal life. And, I easily accept people who believe life is finite. I don’t need to fret about the beliefs of others, and I certainly don’t need to convince others that my beliefs are right.

With practice,recognizing the obvious difference between facts and personal beliefs transforms beyond knowledge into integrated heartfelt behavior. This practice allows me to grow beyond tolerating others into a graceful acceptance of vast diversity. This transformation is a challenge worthy of my creativity. The peace of mind acceptance brings is a valuable incentive. Well, that is what I believe. Do you still hear me laughing?

Like others, I enjoy talking to people who share my beliefs. It is joyful to encounter others who agree with me. It’s fun for me to share my opinions and beliefs about life, creation, human nature, spirituality, and so much more. I confess that sometimes I still follow the urge to defend my beliefs as if they are facts. I don’t claim perfection nor do I seek it. When I practice catching myself defending a personal belief as if it is “the truth”—I laugh. I pay close attention to ideas and issues that trigger my defensive behavior regarding my beliefs. I acknowledge that these concepts represent my most cherished beliefs. These are the beliefs that form my values. My judgment defines who I am. There is no guilt or shame in judging what is right or wrong, good or bad for me. When I act as if I can judge what is right or wrong, good or bad for others, I have forgotten that I am just seeing things as I am. I easily sidestep any coaching to bash my ego for acting up.

Intention to Promote Acceptance: I easily recognize the difference between facts and beliefs. I remind myself that my beliefs form personal truths, not universal truths. I invite others to enjoy sharing their point of view, and I welcome diversity around beliefs. I do my best to refrain from the tendency to defend my beliefs as if I know a universal truth. Naturally, I accept that my beliefs sound like the truth to me. I joyfully practice letting go of the notion that others must conform to or confirm my beliefs. With eyes wide open, I’m able to love myself just as I am, and I love you with equal acceptance. I select the beliefs that shape and color my entire reality, and so do you. I am free to be me. You are free to be you. It’s okay if our beliefs differ. I am not afraid of your beliefs, and I let go of any urge to prove that I’m right.

Stepping Up to Fear

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TeriWilliams
“Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.” – Bill Cosby

Could facing your fears really be that easy?  In most cases, I say YES loud and clear.

There is nothing that keeps us stuck more than fear.  It can be paralyzing both physically and emotionally.

Believe it or not there was a time that I was so afraid to speak in front of a group that I had to hire people to do it for me.  I would literally make myself sick.  Talk about NOT practicing what you preach.

When my father died, I wrote part of the eulogy – for my sister to read at his funeral.  I couldn’t do it, even for him, the man that constantly told me,“If you want to get anywhere in life, you have to stick your neck out”.  (After all, he was a turtle.)

When my son was a little boy (ok, he’ll always be my little boy).  Seriously, when he was 11, I took on the role of Pack Master for his school district.  That meant I had to speak to over 100 parents on a regular basis.  Nope!  Not me.  I coerced one of my friends to partner with me.  I did the writing and she did the speaking!  It was a great plan until she got sick.  With trembling knees I stepped up to the podium and read my speech.  Guess what – it was warmly welcomed.  I didn’t die, no one laughed at me, well maybe a little, I didn’t trip and fall; I’m still here to write about it.

Hindsight is a great teacher. What I realized was that I had been facing fears my whole life – MY WHOLE LIFE!  When you think about it, I bet you have too.  We all have a story around fear.

After that night, I made a list of all the ways I had stepped up to fear in the past.   Some were big fears, and some were little fears.   Here’s what part of my list looked like, and here’s what I did:

  • Fear of dogs after being bitten more than once – I have 2 dogs, really big dogs
  • Fear of being alone – I spend time alone – a lot
  • Fear of change – I embrace it
  • Fear of speaking – I host a radio show and give motivational speeches before hundreds of people
  • Fear of sobriety – I don’t drink (maybe that should be facing my demons)

There’s a lot more where that came from.  You get the picture.  Sometimes I take giant steps, and sometimes I take baby steps – I keep stepping into them and come out shining on the other side.

So when I read that quote from Bill Cosby, I shook my head up and down with a resounding YES.

Almost everything we do begins with a choice.  Simple as it sounds, you can choose to step past your fear and step into your greatness.

May I suggest you begin by imagining yourself as Gandalf the White Wizard – tell your fear “Thou shall not pass!”

 

How to Start an Exercise Program

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Starting an exercise program begins right from where you presently are, even if that means you begin on the couch.

DFTNThe first step is to dream big.

Visualize how amazing you will feel with a healthy, fit and happy body! What does that look like for you?

Cut out photographs, make a collage, create a dream board… the more the better. The point is to really start living the dream of total fitness in your mind. Then you can move that vision into your body through the actions that evolve from your imagination.

You create your own dream, your why, and your purpose.

Starting an exercise program begins right from where you presently are, even if that means you begin on the couch. You want to make your dream a reality in your mind in order to create health and fitness in your life.

This dream becomes your north star, your road map to your destination.

Now you are ready to create your plan! Ask yourself what is the “who, what, where, when” of your plan.

Who will you work with? A DVD program, a trainer at the gym, an instructor-taught class, or maybe even working with a group of friends?

I highly recommend working with a qualified, skilled coach/trainer. A truly qualified coach possesses all of the knowledge, motivation and resources you will need to achieve your goal to complete fitness. They are not usually the trainers staffed at your local gyms, and so it might take a bit of looking to find the right wellness coach for you.

I recommend seeking out a CHEK Practitioner, in your area. This can be achieved by going online to www.chekinstitute.com, and looking under“find a Practitioner.”

What type of exercise makes you feel good: Pilates, yoga, weights, boot camps, martial arts, Zumba, boxing? You get to pick.

Where are you performing your fitness routine? Will you be working out at home, a gym, or a studio?

When is the best time of day for your workout?

Most importantly, you must remain focused on the big picture. Visualize how amazing you are going to feel with this newly created health and fitness.

Of course, it is important that you consult your doctor before starting any exercise program. But don’t worry. This can actually be fun! A good doctor will recommend a full exam that includes checking your weight, height (which you can then use to determine your BMI – body mass index), blood pressure, heart rate, cholesterol, and fasting glucose levels. Your doctor can then discuss with you the option of slowly weaning you off any possible medications for diabetes, high blood pressure, cholesterol, ect.) It is always a good position to know where you are starting in your health program, so you can reassess how you are progressing along the way.

Start your exercise program at a low level. Don’t overdo it in the beginning because the body needs time to adjust. Your joints need to stabilize, and your muscles need to adapt to new movement patterns. In this way you will progress in a manner that proves safer and faster. This will allow you to progress through your exercise regime in a way that doesn’t cause pain, which could result in injuries that slow your progress.

It might also be helpful to have a support group of friends that are consistent and committed to making similar lifestyle changes. Even if you’re new in town, there is information to be found online that will direct you to a local group in your area.

Here is an important tip: don’t do diets!

Yes, they are everywhere. You cannot escape them on the television, radio or even online. Yes, they will most probably allow you to take the weight off in the beginning, but once you begin to stray or stop these programs, the weight most certainly will return, with a few more bonus pounds added.

The best way to eat is the most simple and effective way. Eat only real food that you prepare yourself. Ingest quality proteins, fruit, vegetables (grown mostly above ground), and quality fats from your proteins. Now this is general, and we have not discussed portion sizes, but you can go to my website and get all this information at www.holistichealth-fitness.com

Becoming aware of what works for you will help you the most in achieving a healthy lifestyle. This includes understanding what food, exercise and healthy routines you are most receptive to. The more aware you become, the easier it is to get results without stumbling around trying everything out there.

In my first article, I spoke of the Six Fundamentals of Health: paradigms, breath, hydration, exercise, nutrition and sleep. Each one of these components is part and parcel to you creating the healthy, happy, vibrant body and life you desire.

Create the plan that works for you. What times in the day work best for you to exercise? How much time do you have? Set a schedule and make a calendar so you can check the days off.

Because of my schedule, exercise needs to be done first thing in the morning. If you have kids, this could also be the best time to exercise. Completing your workout before your family and the resulting demand on your time arise reduces conflict in the morning routine.

For your schedule, exercising might mean taking forty minutes during your lunch break to take a class, or exercising after work before you go home. You decide what works best for you. It may be a combination of the three.

When it comes to food, getting your shopping done all at once helps with time.

When I go shopping, I purchase most of the foods I need all at once. I also take advantage of my local farmers market. This provides me the opportunity to buy all of my vegetables for the week, and sometimes even all of my meats. I usually purchase a whole chicken, a few pieces of red meat, and a big piece of salmon. As soon as I get home I cook the meats. I decide whether to bake or grill a dish, or sometimes I will slow-cook the meat in a crockpot. I also cut about a two-quart Tupperware bowl full of mixed vegetables that will last me about five meals. Once the meats are cooked, they go into the refrigerator in separate Tupperware containers. Each night I prepare the following day’s meals and snacks along with making that night’s dinner.

I have a nice insulated food pack that I carry with me to work. This way I always have my food with me.

When it comes to water consumption throughout the day, it can be just like food. If you don’t have it with you, you won’t drink it. So go get yourself a liter bottle (or larger if you can find one), and make it a container that is fun for you. Choose one in your favorite color, or with a clever design. Do your best to drink water throughout the day. Most everyone should be drinking half their body weight in ounces every day.

Achieving total health really is all in the planning. So give yourself permission to sit down and figure out your plan before you start. Having most of it in place will go a long way in accomplishing your goals, and a lot less stress will be involved.

Go to www.holistichealth-fitness.com and start reading through the blogs. Check out all the websites and articles on the Library media page. You’ll find everything from water to breathing right there!

I am always here to help and support you.

I wish for all of you Vibrant Health!

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