A safe harbor where beliefs are respected and kindness prevails.

Who Is It You Desire To Become?

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Fotolia_4656516_Subscription_LMost of us have little problem answering the question “what do you want in life”?

Some will say wealth, and some will say true love. Others will say health, a beautiful home, a nice car, or a successful career, or a family.

All are perfectly good answers and there is no reason why they cannot be achieved.

When I ask clients “Who Is It You Desire To Become” most have to take time to process the question. After a few moments, many say they are fine with whom they are, they just want a better life. They will then proceed to describe many of the above conditions, which they feel will produce this better life.

It usually starts with “ Well if I only …(fill in the blank) then I would be happy”. Then the description of the conditions would follow.

What is not being understood and accepted here is that conditions must follow conditioning. In other words, for you to acquire something in your life you must set the conditions within yourself first. It is only then that you will have the ability to create what you desire to become.

Possibly you have heard the example about attracting love. It is said, “ You must become the person you want to attract.” If I desire to attract a loving, affectionate, beautiful, funny, … (I have a long list) woman as my soul mate, then I must become this within myself. You will attract that which you believe yourself to be.

The same goes for all your desires in life. If you desire wealth, happiness, and health, then you must know yourself as such. By becoming what you desire you become a magnet.

I ask you now. Who Is It You Desire To Become? If you cannot give a description in perfect detail along with the feeling of already having it, then you are just treading water.

This is the first place I start when working with a new client. I don’t go much further until the client knows what he or she desires in their health, fitness, and wellness.

This statement is a declaration of what we together are going to achieve. From this statement we can then create a plan to move forward.

People are afraid to really let go and admit to what they desire, because they realize there will be some work to do on their part to achieve it. They are right of course, but what is so off-putting to some work if it will create the life you have always desired?

You are not meant to dream and sit on your hands all day in hope that it will just happen. That’s not how it’s done, not if you want to experience it in the physical world.

Interestingly, so many of us go to work for someone else and work our tails off, while thinking “I should be doing this for myself”. In this case you are working for someone else’s dream are you not?

We need to create the motivation within ourselves to become who we desire to be. Taking this action is going to be a bit uncomfortable for many, but so worth it.

I encourage you to take the time to find a quite space away from all distractions, and begin to express who you desire to become. Not what you want, those are just things. I want you to step out and ask yourself “Who do I really want to become? What would it feel like to be this person? What would my life be like?”

Write it all down in as much detail as possible. Describe the feelings that go along with this new you. Then I want you to refine the statement into a paragraph. Make it in the present tense as if you are living it right now.

When you’re done with this I want you to email me your “Statement of Gratitude” for your new life. In the subject line of the email write “Who I Desire To Become”.

I will choose the 5 best statements, and email you back with tips and directions for the next step.

Here’s a clue. Part of who you desire to be should include your health, fitness, or wellness.

I can’t wait to read your “Who I Desire To Become”.

I wish for you Vibrant Health.

David Fresilli – C.H.E.K. Holistic Health Practitioner / Corrective Exercise Specialist

Want to work with David? Contact him here:

Holistic Health & Fitness

David@holistic.health.fitness00@gmail.com

www.holistichealth-fitness.com

Telephone: 541-941-8800

You Deserve A Break – Bliss Break!

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We’ve multitasked our way right out of the present moment” says Thomas Crum, author of Three Deep Breaths.

soaking up the sun at Eastern MarketWhere is the bliss in that? Reconnecting with our bliss is essential to creating peace in our lives and summer offers a great opportunity to live lightly! You don’t need a 10 day vacation in the islands (okay, I admit that might be nice as the weather changes), you can start right now creating inner harmony, making room for less stress, by taking much-needed bliss breaks.

Here are 7 tips to make your life a little more soul-cial:

1. Breathe deep at least 3 times per day – Stop whatever you are doing at least 3 times per day and take three slow, deep purposeful breaths – filling your lungs with oxygen and your soul with life. This brings a sense of inner tranquility and can soothe away any tension, frustration and anxiety.

2. Take a 15 minute walk, preferably in nature – Simply walk at a pace that feels comfortable to you. Pay attention to the ebb and flow of the natural world. There is a sweet sensation that comes over us when we observe the synchronicity of life through animals and plants. One of the coolest things to observe during summer is a firefly/lightning bug as it flits around a yard.

3. Remove one thing from your life that is non-essential – We fill our time with non-essential “stuff”. Think about what you do on a daily basis, ask yourself is it really bringing you joy? Eliminate one thing that feels daunting and taxing.

4. Laugh, laughter feeds the soul – Watch your favorite comedy; write down and relive the funniest thing that ever happened to you or simply sit and laugh. Laughter helps you take things lightheartedly and is one of the best forms of medicine. Bonus…it’s FREE! I dare you to look in the mirror and take 60 seconds to simply laugh with yourself!

5. Listen to music everyday – Turn on your favorite tunes and listen. Sing if it makes you feel good, out loud if you can. Focusing on music can reduce pain, decrease depression and bring about a sense of calm. Grab the microphone and pretend you’re Sheryl Crow belting out “I’m gonna soak up the sun!”

6. Practice gratitude – Look forward to every day and be grateful for each moment. In any given minute we can find something to be grateful for; sometimes we simply don’t see it. Start a gratitude journal, share with your friends what you are thankful for, including them, practice saying, “Thank you” more often, or, as my friend and colleague Dr. John W. Beiter says, “Write at least one Thank You note to someone every day!”

7. Of course, Smile! No explanation needed!

Are you ready to soak up the sun and take a bliss break?

What Is Constant And What Is Moving?

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fotolia_816374_Subscription_LA friend of mine was thinking about re-painting her living room because she is not in love with the original color she selected. Although everyone she asks loves it, she was still lukewarm about it.

When we talked about it, which was often, I told her to trust her instincts and make a decision. That didn’t help because she couldn’t make up her mind and she would still talk about not totally loving the color. While listening to her, sometimes I would think, “C’mon, make a decision already.” But she wouldn’t.

As I was driving one day and thinking about how we, in general, vacillate about things (and of course I am no exception!), the light bulb went on in my head.   This is a classic example of the idea spoken by Anais Nin – “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.”

My theory is that my friend’s mood is already in place when she opens her front door at the end of her workday.  And how she perceives the paint color is dependent upon her mood. When she’s in a good mood, she feels good about the paint job. When she is cranky, she doesn’t like it.

I discussed this idea with her and invited her to do an experiment: for five days she would observe what kind of mood she is in before she opens the front door, and to gauge how she feels about the paint after she opens the front door.

The results were:

Day 1 – She was tired but felt okay, the paint looked just okay.

Day 2 – She was peaceful and the paint looked pretty good.

Day 3 – She was cranky and the paint looked terrible.

Day 4 – She was happy and felt pretty good about the room.

Day 5 – She was happy and the paint job was okay.

Afterwards, she told me that this had been a beneficial exercise for her. Although overall she was okay about the paint color, she wasn’t truly in love with it. She thought that if she came home and was cranky, ideally, she wanted to be cheered up by the room. Therefore, she got the clarity she felt she needed and decided to change the paint color.

And there it was. She was true to her decision and changed the color of the paint, and she has been very happy with it ever since.

I appreciated going through that exercise with her because I learned a lot about myself as well. There were times when she talked to me about the color of the paint and I was okay with hearing about it for the umpteenth time, and other times I felt so annoyed about it. She was, at all times, being her truest self, and, it was my own mood that was the driver on how I felt about our interaction.

When I’m cranky, many things look bleak or damaged. However, when I’m feeling good and balanced, those very same things appear to be just fine. So, what is constant and what is moving? I am moving. All of the time. The thing I am thinking about, whatever it is, is existing in its truest state, and it is me who is changing. My perception is changing, based upon how I am feeling at the moment.

If you are willing, try this for yourself. First observe your mood and then notice how you feel about someone or something. Chances are your mood will impact your perception. Again, everyone and everything is just being itself and you are the one who is doing the perceiving. And based upon your mood, your perception may change.

Finally, when you find yourself happy and balanced, chances are you will be at peace with everything and everyone around you.

Better than Gossip

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Fotolia_55241929_Subscription_XXLThere is a certain thrill when you tell someone something shocking about someone else. There is a sense of power, of knowing something the other person doesn’t know. This “thrill” has been around for thousands of years. So why should we give it up now, why should we change?

There are a lot of reasons to learn to control the urge to gossip.

  1. How temporary is that “thrilling’ feeling and how soon is it followed by a feeling of guilt. What if it isn’t true? What if the person who is the object of the gossip finds out about your idle chatter? What if they are hurt by it? Our consciousness has evolved to a point that these subtle feelings can no longer be ignored.       The discomfort they cause you WILL show up eventually, even if you aren’t totally aware of it. Even if you don’t LIKE the person you are talking about, the price you will pay will be in how YOU feel.
  2. Every word we speak has an energy to it. So when you are speaking bad words about someone, you are surrounding yourself with “bad energy.” Your vibration will shift down a notch and you will have less “glow” about you. It isn’t extreme, but why would you allow the downward shift, even if just a few degrees? At some point in your life, hasn’t someone said to you “You are just glowing today.” Think back about how you were feeling at that moment in time. Most of us cannot actually see people’s aura, but most of us have a subtle sense of when someone’s aura is expanded due to happiness, when they seem to be “glowing.”
  3. Other people who are developing an awareness about the down sides of gossip will move away from you. They may change the subject, find an excuse to leave the room, or just not return your next phone call. This would start to isolate you from people who are on their path to grow, to raise their vibration and the vibrations of those around them. Instead, you become a magnet to those who live in that field of emotional drama. THEY will return your phone calls and in fact feed you with MORE gossip about other people…knowing how much you love it!
  4. You become a more trusted advisor. I know people who I can trust with my deepest secrets, and other people who I KNOW can’t wait to get away from me so they can share my secret with everyone they know, elevating their feeling of power in the community. Not that you want to become counselor to the world, but there is a value in being “trustworthy.” I got caught in a gossip ring at a corporate job I had once and the CEO called me in to ask about it. I denied it at first, but then had to confess. I felt that I had dropped down a notch in his eyes. I felt he could no longer trust me as much as he had before this incident. To this day I am embarrassed by my behavior. It was a very maturing incident in my life.
  5. Master Yeshua (Jesus) said it was a bad thing to do. “Do unto other as you would have done unto yourself.” Many Master Teachers on the planet have said the same thing in their own words. No matter your religious or philosophical training, I’ll just bet you can find a similar statement. In fact, I challenge you to look for one and share it with us! If you find something, please send it to me and I will post in my next column.

For the next two weeks, observe yourself and your feelings if an opportunity for gossip comes up. It might be just as simple as a wisecrack about the way someone is dressed at the grocery store, or a really big story about someone you know. First, see if you can restrain yourself. See how that makes you feel. Then if you give in and do it, see how you feel about 15 minutes later.

These are very subtle energies and feelings, but they can be yet another turning point in your life…UP the path, not DOWN the path!

I do hope to hear from you! Write me at voiceofyoursoul@gmail.com

And have a GREAT week!

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