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Get Up On Your High Horse

October 15, 2014 by Mary Sambrosky

Fotolia_19719715_Subscription_XXLWe all have a voice. A platform. A way of being able to help and serve others.  You might not think of yourself that way, but it is true.

Believe that you are touching people’s lives and making a difference every single day, in your own way. Whether you realize it, or meant to, or not.

Sometimes we share a personal experience, or a gentle observation about life. Sometimes we turn the mirror back around on someone with a grander, not-so-gentle outlook on another’s current situation.  All of these things, when meant to help and given with an intention of love, can make a positive difference in someone’s life.

This means that in your way, with your true self, you are being of service to the greater good of those whom you are connecting.  Never underestimate your power and ability to make a difference-to have an impact.

Know with certainty that sometimes you must stand from a higher vantage point in order to be able to offer this help.  Many of us fear that we will be seen as a know-it-all, or as standing in judgment of another.  But check in with yourself.  Remember that if your intention is pure and you aren’t standing in judgment, how another perceives it is none of your business.  You do the best you can, with the right frame of mind.

Don’t be afraid to show your true self and offer your personal wisdom.   We go through experiences in this life in order to learn. Sometimes that learning is not just valuable to our selves, but to those that you meet as well. You truly never know how sharing will touch someone and create a positive affect in another’s life. You serve the world by getting up on your high horse when you are not doing it from a place of authority or ego, but instead, a desire to offer something to make someone else’s experience seem a little lighter or clearer.

There are a couple rules of thumb that can help you get your message across in the most loving way. The first is to stop and remember, “Was I asked? Are they asking for my input?” Nothing comes across as being more “high and mighty” than putting in your two cents when it’s unsolicited.

Next ask, “What is my intention in offering this sage advice?” Is it with good intention, love, and gentle awareness? The gentle awareness piece can be key. Can you offer it gently without it coming across as rough, uncaring? Are you about to spit out your superior insights because you are thinking, “you can not really be this dumb?” Because if you are…I’d say take a step back, a deep breath, and mostly, REMAIN SILENT. This is not the time or emotional space to be doling out “how to’s” and “you should’s”.

Which actually brings up an extra side note. If what is about to come out of your mouth includes the phrase “you should” or “you shouldn’t”, I’d ask you to think twice. Should’s are often an indication of a personal perspective that is imposing on someone else’s ability to have their own perspective. It doesn’t mean that you are doing it maliciously, just know that there is often that energy associated with a “should”.

My final point is to go with your gut. As always, check in for a quick moment. Did you just recognize a flash of gloating that this person is coming to you with this particular problem for help? Does the response rolling around in your head make you feel a little tense or make your stomach turn? This could mean a couple things depending on how well you communicate on an emotional level, but you know yourself. So what does it mean for you?

Did a personal story pop into your mind as they were explaining their situation? For me, that’s always an indication that there is a nugget of wisdom in there that is probably beneficial for the other person. So tell your story, even if it isn’t exactly clear how it might relate to them. This is your “gut” talking.

Remember that knights in shining armor sit up on high horses. Being up on your high horse does not always have to have the negative connotation that we often associate it with. The knights were perched up there for a better, clearer line of sight. It offered them extra protection from the messiness that was down below. In this same way, your elevated view when guiding another may not be such a bad thing. It can be to their advantage.

So ride high my friends! You must go off bravely, sharing your wisdom and insight. You never know who may be in need of rescuing.

Stacking The Odds In Your Favor

October 10, 2014 by Dave Fresilli

DF2Fall is upon us once more. And so it begins that, with summer over and the days getting shorter, we wish to ease into more consistent actions that create personal health and fitness.

Unfortunately, with the cooler weather and holidays approaching, many will begin taking in sweets and junk foods and the like. Along with this first insult to the body systems, some folks will allow the busier schedule of the holiday season to be yet another reason for slacking off on their exercise.

In all, these misplaced actions send the body into a tailspin. The body is not able to keep up with the onslaught of over-eating, eating poor quality foods, and not getting the exercise or sleep that the body actually craves at this time!

The final result is that after January 1st, the reckoning time comes when you look at yourself in the mirror and admit you need to do something about how awful you feel. ‘Where did those extra ten to fifteen pounds come from,’ you naively ask? It is as if you didn’t want to take responsibility for your actions through the holiday season by pleading ignorance.

It’s as if you’re standing in front of your subconscious saying, “I swear your honor, I didn’t know that eating all those extra sweets, and fatty foods, and alcohol, along with not doing my exercise, was going to put on all this weight and make me feel so horrible!”

Now that we have imagined what will happen if you allow yourself to let go, let’s design some simple steps to keep you, not only on track with your health and fitness, but also accelerate your results.

How would it feel if, on January 2nd, you looked in the mirror and saw a lean, healthy, strong and vibrant body?

I know exactly what you would feel. You would have such a sense of accomplishment and pride in yourself for sticking to your guns and doing what you knew was right.

Let’s stack the odds in your favor so that you have this amazing experience come January 2nd.

  1. Get very clear on what you want your body and health to be like. It does not matter where you start. Write your goals down and put them in the present tense as if you already have it right now.
  2. Every morning, afternoon and evening you will take 5-10 minutes to visualize what a healthy body feels like as if you already have it.
  3. Make a list of the simple actions you must take to assure you don’t get caught off guard.
  4. Prepare all meals ahead of time for daily consumption. You could even make everything in one weekend and freeze some of it!
  5. Make sure to bring food with you to work and play.
  6. Bring 2-3 quarts of filtered water with you every day. Make sure to drink it.
  7. Get quality sleep – Bed by 10pm, wake at 6am.
  8. Exercise everyday – even if you only have time for walking.
  9. Always eat before going out to a party so that you are not tempted to eat all the high carb, fatty, sodium and sugar filled foods.
  10. When you find your thoughts drifting to negative ideas, recognize that they are only a product of past experiences. Now is the time for you to create a new reality in which you are in control of your thoughts, feelings and actions.

Remember you must take responsibility to create this healthy, fit, vibrant life. You already have all it takes. It is now time to use your God-given abilities to see that the autumn season is actually a new beginning!

Here is a complimentary webinar to get you started. I would love to help you on your journey of health and wellness.

I wish for all of you Vibrant Health!

Dave

Attitude – A Matter Of Choice!

October 9, 2014 by Teri Williams

Attitude

Attitude is a small thing that makes a big difference! – Winston Churchill

Several years ago my husband gave me a beautiful gift: a decorative jar filled with 365 tiny sheets of paper. Each piece had a question. Some questions were deep, others were simple. A year later, I returned the gift in the form of a book titled, “The Blisstory Journal” and offered him many of those same questions to answer.

One of my favorite questions in the book is: “How do you describe your attitude?”

Most of you know by now, my attitude is pretty darn “blissful”, hence the title, “The Bliss Lady”. I remain connected to my inner state of joy quite easily. I’m not perfect at it by any means. In fact, my husband and daughter will testify to that.

Although I do have my moments, it’s how I pull myself out of that spiral that counts! (Notice the word “moments”.) For me it’s simply a matter of choice. I get to choose how I will act or react to whatever crosses my path. Guess what – so do you! We all have a choice, no matter what the circumstance.

As I grow older, witnessing our children blossom into adulthood, I see more than ever the importance of having a grounded attitude. It becomes more important than your education, your income level, and your past perceived failures; certainly more important than what people think of you.

Every minute of every day we are offered a choice regarding what we will do with our attitude. I’ve heard it said that life is 10 percent what happens to you and 90 percent how you react to it. I say, “Life is what happens FOR me and how I react to it is what matters.” Sometimes I need a boost.

Simple attitude boosters

  1. Deep Breathing – Before you react to anything take three slow deep breaths. Of all the tools I’ve learned over the years deep breathing has been the most helpful to me in keeping my “attitude” in check. When I’m feeling extremely reactive I include #2.
  2. Count to 10 – You’ve probably heard that before. Counting aids as a distractor from whatever it is that’s pushing your button with the element of time. The higher you count the less likely you are to react strongly.
  3. Surround yourself in love – When you feel that your attitude is less than joyful take a minute to close your eyes and see yourself surrounded, fully enveloped in the light of love, as if you are receiving a soft, gentle hug.

When it comes to attitude, you always have a choice. So….How do you describe your attitude?

P.S. Click HERE to visit my website to receive a free copy of The Blisstory Journal!

Friends For Life…Or Not!

October 6, 2014 by Robbie Adkins

Fotolia_8202612_Subscription_Monthly_MI was having dinner recently with a lifetime friend and he was asking about some people that we both knew many, many years ago. Twice I had to say “We’re not friends any more because ‘bla bla bla’ happened.” By the second time I had to say that in one evening, I started to think there was something wrong with me. I started to think I was too judgmental. So I have been thinking about it ever since.

I very much value the friendship of the person I was talking to. Years have gone by when we have had little or no contact, but we knew each other when we both jumped out of airplanes…by choice (he still does!) There is a certain bond that happens with people who do extreme sports together, a sort of unspoken recognition of each other as a kindred spirit. Now circumstances have made it convenient for us to see each other again so we are catching up on all the missing years, all the missing stories.

In thinking about which friends I keep and which friends I let go of, my rules are pretty simple. And after contemplation, I stand by my guidelines. It really comes down to knowing if they support me, or if they judge me, either openly or passive aggressively. Life is really to short and every day of my life is too valuable to me to be with people who bring my energy down.

If I am to be uplifting to those around me, those that I care about, I owe it to them to keep my energy positive. That is not being selfish, that is being an “energy conservationist!” After I am with a friend, I measure how I feel. If I feel:

  • Good about myself and them
  • Energized by the conversation
  • Encouraged about a project I am working on I shared with them
  • Happy to be alive
  • Happy that I know them

Then that is a good, even great friend to spend time with.

However, if after a visit with a friend, I:

  • Am drained energetically
  • Doubt myself
  • Am irritable
  • Am Jealous
  • Find myself in a bad mood

Then something has not been good about that exchange.

I don’t mean that if you have one bad day with a friend you must drop them! No, it is a conclusion that one comes to after MANY encounters. I am sure I have been a drain on friends at times, and some of my best friends need uplifting when they are down…that is just what friends do…good friends.

So how do you know when to let go? There is no time frame that can be given, but at some point, a light bulb just goes off in your head and you just KNOW. If you have given it your best and the relationship stays in the same old pattern that doesn’t serve you, then it is time to move away…and not feel guilty about it.

So I forgive myself for not holding on to every single friend I have ever had, and I truly cherish the wonderful beings that I still have the privilege of knowing! I am lucky that I still have many of those!

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